how to make friends as an introvert with social anxiety

Mariah Brown

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Mariah Brown

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Welcome! Are you an introvert with social anxiety who is looking to make friends? You’ve come to the right place. Making friends can be challenging, especially when you prefer solitude and find social situations overwhelming. But fear not, because in this article, we will explore ten valuable tips that can help you navigate the world of socializing and build meaningful connections despite your introverted nature and social anxiety.

how to make friends as an introvert with social anxiety

As someone who has experienced firsthand the struggle of making friends as an introvert with social anxiety, I understand how challenging it can be. But remember, you are not alone. Many others like you are seeking guidance on this journey. So, let’s dive in and explore some valuable tips that can help you make friends and enjoy the benefits of social connections.

Evaluate Your Reasons for Making Friends

Before diving into the process of making friends, it’s crucial to evaluate your reasons for seeking friendships. Ask yourself why you want to build connections with others. Understanding your motivations will help you foster genuine relationships based on shared interests and values.

It’s important to emphasize quality over quantity when it comes to friendships. Building a few deep and meaningful connections is more fulfilling than having numerous shallow relationships. Focus on finding individuals who genuinely appreciate and understand you.

Embrace Your Interests

One of the best ways to make friends as an introvert with social anxiety is to embrace your interests. Engaging in activities that align with your passions will naturally attract like-minded individuals who share those interests. Whether it’s joining a book club, taking up a hobby, or attending events related to your favorite topics, being in spaces with people who share similar interests can help foster connections.

By making friends within your areas of interest, you can ensure that you have a solid foundation for building connections. Common passions provide great conversation starters and offer comfort and ease during social interactions.

Step Out of Your Comfort Zone

While embracing your interests is vital, it’s equally important to step out of your comfort zone and try new things. Challenging yourself to explore unfamiliar territories allows for personal growth and opens doors to new opportunities for friendship. Pushing boundaries can be uncomfortable, but it also presents a chance to break free from the limitations of social anxiety and connect with others.

Discover new activities that pique your curiosity. Attend social events, engage in group activities, or take classes that promote interaction. It may feel daunting at first, but remember that growth happens outside your comfort zone.

Play to Your Strengths

As an introvert with social anxiety, it’s crucial to play to your strengths when it comes to socializing. Focus on activities that align with your natural inclinations. Perhaps you prefer one-on-one conversations or small group settings. Seek out situations where you feel comfortable and can showcase your unique qualities.

By playing to your strengths, you can build confidence in social interactions. Remember that being introverted doesn’t mean you lack valuable traits. You have strengths that are unique to you, and acknowledging and leveraging them will greatly enhance your ability to connect with others.

Remember: Socialization Needs Look Different for Everyone

It’s essential to recognize that everyone’s socialization needs are different. While some people thrive in large social gatherings, you might find solace in smaller, more intimate settings. There is no one-size-fits-all approach to making friends. Understanding your own needs and adapting your socializing style accordingly is key.

Don’t compare yourself to others or feel pressured to conform to societal expectations. Embrace your introversion and find a balance between social interactions and personal space that works for you. Respect your own boundaries and focus on building connections that align with your preferences.

Get More Involved in Your Surroundings

A great way to make friends as an introvert with social anxiety is to get more involved in your surrounding community. Engage in local activities, volunteer for causes you care about, or join clubs or groups that align with your interests. By becoming more immersed in your environment, you increase your chances of meeting people who share common values and passions.

Be proactive in seeking out opportunities for social interaction. Attend community events, participate in workshops, or join online forums and communities where you can engage with others who have similar experiences. These interactions can lead to meaningful connections and potential friendships.

Change Your Behavior, Not Your Identity

While it’s important to step out of your comfort zone and adapt your behavior to foster relationships, it’s essential to stay true to yourself. Focus on changing your behavior, not your identity. Authenticity is key when it comes to building genuine connections.

Instead of pretending to be someone you’re not, work on improving social skills and communication techniques that align with your personality and values. Develop strategies to manage social anxiety, such as deep breathing exercises or positive affirmations. By staying true to yourself, you attract friends who appreciate you for who you are.

Cultivate Patience

Building meaningful friendships takes time and patience. It’s important to remember that friendships aren’t formed overnight. Be patient with yourself and the process. Celebrate the small victories along the way and don’t be discouraged by setbacks.

Be open to meeting new people and allow connections to develop naturally. Don’t rush or force relationships. Genuine friendships require a strong foundation of trust and understanding, and these bonds take time to cultivate. Stay persistent, keep putting yourself out there, and eventually, you will find kindred spirits who appreciate your unique qualities.

Reach Out to a Professional

If you’re struggling with social interactions and finding it difficult to make friends as an introvert with social anxiety, reaching out to a professional can be incredibly helpful. A therapist or counselor experienced in anxiety-related concerns can provide guidance, support, and tools to overcome social anxiety challenges.

Professional help can assist you in understanding the root causes of your social anxiety and offer strategies tailored to your unique situation. Therapy can be a valuable resource in helping you navigate the complexities of building connections and managing anxiety symptoms.

The Bottom Line

Remember, making friends as an introvert with social anxiety is possible. It might take time, effort, and patience, but with the right approach, you can build meaningful connections. Understand and embrace your introversion, play to your strengths, and engage in activities that align with your interests. Seek out like-minded individuals while respecting your own boundaries.

Don’t forget that everyone’s socialization needs look different, so focus on finding what works for you. Step out of your comfort zone, but stay true to yourself throughout the process. And if you need additional support, reach out to a professional who can guide you on this journey. Making friends is within your reach, and the rewards of meaningful connections are worth the effort.


Q: How can I overcome shyness as an introvert with social anxiety?

A: Overcoming shyness takes time and practice. Start by challenging yourself to engage in small social interactions and gradually work your way up. Visualization techniques, deep breathing exercises, and positive self-talk can also be helpful in managing anxiety in social situations.

Q: What if I don’t enjoy large social gatherings?

A: It’s perfectly okay to not enjoy large social gatherings. Focus on finding activities and events that align with your preferences and comfort level. Seek out smaller group settings or one-on-one interactions where you feel more at ease.

Q: How can I start a conversation with someone new?

A: Starting a conversation with someone new can feel intimidating, but remember that everyone appreciates genuine interest. Begin by asking open-ended questions about their interests, hobbies, or opinions. Listen actively and find common ground to build upon.

Q: What if I feel overwhelmed during social interactions?

A: If you feel overwhelmed during social interactions, take a step back and practice self-care. Excuse yourself for a few minutes to regroup, take deep breaths, or engage in grounding techniques. Remember, it’s okay to prioritize your well-being and set boundaries.

Q: Is it better to have a few close friends or a large group of acquaintances?

A: Quality is more important than quantity when it comes to friendships. Building a few close friendships where there is mutual understanding and support is more fulfilling than having a large group of acquaintances. Focus on building genuine connections with like-minded individuals.

Q: How can I make friends in an online setting?

A: Making friends online can be a great option for introverts with social anxiety. Join online communities and forums centered around your interests. Engage in conversations, share experiences, and reach out to individuals who resonate with you. Virtual friendships can be just as meaningful as in-person connections.

Q: What if I fear rejection when approaching others?

A: The fear of rejection is common, but it’s important to realize that everyone experiences it to some extent. Remember that rejection is a part of life and not a reflection of your worth. Focus on building resilience and taking each interaction as an opportunity to learn and grow.

Q: Should I discuss my social anxiety with potential friends?

A: Disclosing your social anxiety is a personal choice. Some people find it helpful to share their experiences, as it can foster understanding and empathy. However, it’s essential to gauge the level of trust and comfort in the relationship before discussing personal struggles.

Q: Can online therapy be beneficial for social anxiety?

A: Yes, online therapy can be beneficial for individuals with social anxiety. It offers the convenience of receiving professional support from the comfort of your own space. Online therapists can provide strategies tailored to your situation and guide you through the process of managing and overcoming social anxiety.

Q: How long does it take to make friends as an introvert with social anxiety?

A: The time it takes to make friends as an introvert with social anxiety can vary for each individual. Building strong connections requires patience and persistence. It’s important to focus on the process rather than a specific timeframe. Celebrate small victories along the way and remember that meaningful friendships are worth the investment.


Making friends as an introvert with social anxiety may present unique challenges, but with the right approach and mindset, it is achievable. Remember that there is no one-size-fits-all method for building connections. Embrace your introversion, focus on your strengths, and engage in activities that align with your interests. Allow friendships to develop naturally, be patient with yourself, and don’t hesitate to seek professional help if needed.

By following these tips and strategies, you can gradually build meaningful friendships that enrich your life and allow you to thrive as an introvert with social anxiety. Remember, you deserve genuine connections, and the journey to making friends is a beautiful one.


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